dumber than advertised

So I was re-watching Iron Man 2 (because I am doing the thing where I watch all the Marvel superhero movies to get ready for The Avengers), and there’s that scene where Natasha and Pepper confront Justin Hammer and his colossal fuck-up in trusting Ivan Vanko to build him derivative Stark tech. And while Natasha goes off to be a badass, Pepper calls the police to arrest Hammer for being a criminal schmuck, and Justin goes, “No, honey, don’t call the police.”

And all I could think was that the last time someone called Pepper ‘honey’ in that fake sweet voice that meant he thought he was better than her and she was nothing more than a glorified secretary, he’d ended up “misplacing” all his materials for the upcoming board presentation, which totally would’ve netted him a promotion if he’d been able to find them; missed a few important meetings because all his alarms and reminders disappeared overnight, which got him demoted (again) and talked to (again); and accidentally emailed evidence of his embezzlement to the entire company, especially the CEO who liked Pepper better anyway.

After that, no one ever called Pepper ‘honey’ again. And Justin Hammer’s going to be pretty sorry that he did.

Okay, now I have to go read all the Pepper/Tony and Pepper/Tony/Steve fic ever.